Let’s Talk About Self-Harm And Depression

There is a lot of misunderstanding around a teenager who likes to practice the toxic behavior of self-harming himself. And I want to give my thoughts on this because it’s very important to understand clearly what is happening in someone doing this, and how we can help people to stop inflicting self-harm injuries.

A self-harm is an expression of inflicting a kind of damage in oneself. The most common method is by cutting but also breaking bones, hitting yourself, burning, etc… are known methods of this act.

Self-harm and depression

Self-harm’s Misconception #1

One of the misunderstandings is that people generally do this in the seek of attention (while there are cases this is true, it is false in most cases). Depression, anxiety and self-harm behavior are closely related because people who cannot deal with life and are in an everlasting state of emptiness, feel a relief when they get injured.

It almost like feeling something different from hopelessness, like if they feel pain, they are alive and being connected once again to the world. I know it could be hard to process and I don’t say this is the absolute truth, but I do know this is one of the reasons a lot of teenagers and young adults like to injure their bodies.

Self-harm’s Misconception #2

Self-harming is not a topic that they don’t like to touch and they won’t talk about it. The reality is that they would like to talk about it and express how they feel while they are doing it and why they’re doing it.

What they really won’t like to deal with is the judgment created in the people (and society in general) that don’t understand this kind of behavior. Now, let us make clear that self-harming behavior doesn’t need to be approved by society, but if we as a society understand better why this happens, we as a society can become less judgemental about it and more people can feel more comfortable seeking help to stop doing it in themselves.

Self-harm’s Misconception #3

All people who like to self-harm themselves are suicidal or have suicidal ideation.

This is another belief that is false in a lot of people who injure themselves. While I can understand the possible relationship between hurting oneself and wanting to die, that relationship doesn’t exist in a lot of cases.

We need to just see the worldwide stats of people who suicide and doesn’t present any unregular behavior of hurting themselves. Or the cases of people who practice getting injured on purpose and express that they don’t want to commit suicide.


Something I’ve come to understand about this issue (and keeps me a little puzzled) is that people who adopt this practice are seeking to gain and maintain some sort of control over their lives (mostly in teenagers) because they think if they are inflicting a feeling on their bodies (pain) then they are in control of their feelings.

Another thing we need to understand is that the act of self-injuring oneself is about releasing the feelings by bleeding them out. Like if the blood is charged with those negative feelings and the physical act of letting the blood out can discharge the emotions because they are a lot to handle by a normal human being.

If you’re self-harming yourself, the best advice someone can give you is to seek help, find someone to talk about it and don’t hide it. Don’t try to deal with any of this by yourself, because sometimes it becomes too much to bear it by yourself and you’ll get shattered and worst if you feel you’re doing it alone.

2 thoughts on “Let’s Talk About Self-Harm And Depression”

  1. What a fabulous post! I have been self-harming since I got sober, and that is about 12 years now. I pick at my skin, usually a bug bite or other injury. I pick until I feel the pain, which releases a feeling of relief (OCD) and you cannot think about your emotional pain when faced with physical pain-it’s that simple. I go through bouts where I am fine, but the first stressor that I face? Right back to the drawing board. I think you’d be surprised at how many baby boomers face this on a daily basis. I am a 57 year old female, and the only relief I get is when God takes over. Bless you~

    1. Thank you Michele! I know that there are more people in the world who practices this kind of behavior from what we dare to imagine. I’ve realized that this is a way to distract or forget for a while the emotional pain. I don’t mean to start a political discussion but it really amazed me how in the 1950s and 1960s starting with the hippies and liberal ideas of culture forgetting the fundamental moral values that hold our society it started to explode some of the most common mental illnesses of today like depression and anxiety, bringing with it the generalization of self-harming, suicide, etc… Things only see to be getting worse nowadays but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop trying to spread the message and to help people as best as I can. God bless you too!

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